“Just two words for you, mate,” Spike said, unable to keep the grin off his face. “I win.” Every line of that phone conversation was hilarious, but this line of Spike's takes the entire cake.
Also, I'm hard pressed to think of a sweeter, more thoughtful expression of love and devotion than what Spike's promised Buffy there at the end of the chapter. I'm having emotions.
Well, even off screen, Angel was a complete and utter smeghead in this one. The phone rant was fun to write. And I like to think of Spike devoting his entire being to trying to dote her into evil. Even if it doesn’t work, it’s already dragging him into the good. THank you so much!
I'll admit, I wasn't sure how you were going to make this work out for them, especially with Buffy's soul causing her so much pain. But you did make it work and its actually very sweet with Spike vowing to make her perfectly happy. I love it!
The most adorable evil in the world!
“And if some sod came and cut all your shiny hair off, I’d love you. If someone poked out your eyes, I’d love you. If you were hurt and couldn’t be strong. If you were tired and couldn’t laugh. If you were angry and forgot to be loyal. All these bits of you I’ve fallen in love with — even before you were turned, I’ll bet. I love them, but they’re not you. And when this soul wings off to where it’s s’posed to be, I’ll love you. Still. Because you’re you.” He kissed her gently. “You’re not your hair. You’re not your eyes. You’re not some clever quip. And you’re not a soul. You’re you. You’ll always be you - Oh this man knows how to make a love speech! (beautiful, sigyn. Just beautiful)
And Buffy's anger was just so damn cathartic. I loved the entire thing. FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY.
(and yes, I know I've used about a million capital letters in my reviews. Apparently you make me very... vehement... about things here)
“My goal in life until I succeed, right? Making you, my love, perfectly, deliriously happy. Yes. I plan to devote every bit of my energy to that, until you’re bloody sick of me.” - This is equal part funny and wonderful. I'm really enjoying how Buffy's end goal is not be cursed anymore. That she recognizes it as a curse.
Oh, yes, Spike knows his true love speeches! As for Buffy's annoyance at Angel, OOOOOOh, it was high time.
I very much approve of soulled vampires, but not the curse. I blame that curse on Angel's being quite such an insufferable prat.
Absolutely. Would've been a totally different situation if Buffy had wanted the soul. The fact that they held her down and raped her mind (spirit?) was the completely sickening part...
Oh yeah if it is possible to shag her soul out it should have been gone by now. Of course that's not how it works. Another aspect is the PERFECT happiness portion of the curse. I doubt she'll ever be perfectly happy for many reasons but one of the big ones is that she is a vampire and has no desire to be one.
I love that you had the two of them need sleep first. They've had a hellish bunch of days with high tension so being exhausted should be a given. They had battle after battle then took down the Initiative..on every level they should be tired. I'm glad you didn't just have them move on the the sexcapades without addressing that need first
there was nothing remotely like it after that thing with Angel. LOL Love her referring to her night with Angel as "that thing". Clearly that memory has lost its luster in the face of great sex.
“The thought doesn’t give you any pleasure. Angel went torturing you ‘cause he’d always wanted to, even with the damn soul. Didn’t you get that?” Exactly! That's another lie that Angel has burdened her with while protecting his image (at her expense).
I loved this entire section: “I love every part of you, slayer,” he said. “I love your hair. I love your eyes. I love your lips. I love your sharp, naughty teeth.” He kissed down her throat to her collarbone. “I love your skin,” he said. “I love your nails. I love your heart. .... “And if some sod came and cut all your shiny hair off, I’d love you. If someone poked out your eyes, I’d love you. If you were hurt and couldn’t be strong. If you were tired and couldn’t laugh. If you were angry and forgot to be loyal. All these bits of you I’ve fallen in love with — even before you were turned, I’ll bet. I love them, but they’re not you. And when this soul wings off to where it’s s’posed to be, I’ll love you. Still. Because you’re you.” He kissed her gently. “You’re not your hair. You’re not your eyes. You’re not some clever quip. And you’re not a soul. You’re you. You’ll always be you.” Good Lord that was more lovely than the Hell of a woman quote from canon! If she's not already in love with him she's crazy. He's just offered her unconditional love in a way his poet soul would have been proud to own.
caressing words like they were lovers YES! This is the soul of William, a soul that never fully left him. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this description. Words are his first love, his ideal. When he struggled for the proper words to express himself it was like the most all encompassing sexual union. I love how he put his own poem in the mix. I actually liked his finished product. It's far better than he thinks.
Let's face it, Angel let her believe it was sex so she would never have sex again (manipulative bastard). That way he could control her forever and deny her the ability to move on, love again. She shouldn't be blamed if she should decide to stake his arse. You figured it had grown weaker? Like the damn curse had suffered metal fatigue? — Great snark there.
“Oh, listen to yourself. Everyone’s fault but yours. I didn’t make you, you let me!” Sounds like classic Angel.
you didn’t want to get better, you wanted to feed. — No, Angel, you wanted me. And I wanted you to, ‘cause you’d set me up. I thought you’d stay if I gave you everything of me. And you still betrayed me BOOM *mike drops* she nailed it completely! It also didn't help that Angel has NO control over his demon.
You were trying to help yourself. From the very fucking beginning, I was just a means toward your ultimate redemption. Boy does she finally have his number! LOVE her rant in every way. And her comment about him condemning her to the life of a nun is also true. It would have been a big turn on for him too because it would force her into that virginal innocence mold forever.
he and Darla got it on back — when he first — got the curse! I cannot imagine that he didn't screw both Darla and Dru during those two years after the soul. If he hadn't they would ALL have noticed something wrong. Of course he did.
what we had was true love! ... Spike was actually hurt by that. “Do you think he’s right?” Poor Spike. Since she made that comment about loving Angel earlier this hits his vulnerable underbelly. All those years of being second best to Angel where Dru was concerned and he's afraid it's happening all over again.
“A little night club seduction, a dance with a good looking bloke, and you only take a few sips against the wall. Hot and sweet and safe enough, leave him with a powerful hickey. Sound like fun?” ... “How about a good brawl? Fist and fangs? You’ve been letting the demons go, not wanting to fight your own kind. Why not? They deserve it. Take ‘em out. Enjoy the kill.” He's offering her an outlet for her demon's desires without compromising her morals here. No one else has even tried to address those issues with her. He's not wrong IMHO.
I love that they are talking about practical options. She's not wallowing in a bleak future but is seeing other options, happier options. “You’re the only thing that’s made me happy in years. I went and fell in love with you. Awwww sweet but also true.
Well yes, science does demand diligence LOL.
Lovely chapter, very satisfying. Spike is going to show her how to live all Angel and Willow offered to her was a hair-shirt and misery. Her rant to Angel was brilliant in and of itself but the chapter offered so much more than that. Genuine love and romance and a hope for happiness that she deserves and he needs desperately.
Buffy had no possible way of achieving perfect happiness in that moment, because she was scared half to death of what was about to happen. And in fact, that reality is going to stay with her, every moment, sheer inability to relax into the afterglow because of that fear, that sheer terror, of death and destruction about to rain down on everyone she cares about, just as it happened to her. Buffy is afraid of being Angelus, and Perfect Happiness will elude her as long as that happens.
But the shagging was fun.
I simply couldn't imagine them having the energy for a proper sexathon the way Spike would want to do it (gonna do it, do it right!) without some time to recover from their ordeal. It was a big, scary thing they went through! Of course they need to sleep first.
But of course, after great sex, she had to confront Angel. Because DUDE! She flat out says, after they see that sexy movie, "We can't really do any of that stuff," which means, of course, that he's not doing any of it for her, either. And HELLO! That was when she was human and could get as much as she wanted. But no. Really selfish. Ugh, stupid Angel. *kicks Angel*
Yeah, he probably screwed Darla, Dru, and I wouldn't be surprised if he'd screwed Spike during that year or so, but at least in this story he refrained from Spike, because then Spike would know it wasn't sex. And he needed to not know for this story, because story.
And here is where Spike hones on in what her having sex with him actually meant. She was doubling down on being a vampire. She needed to accept that part of herself, and she had felt she had to lose the soul to do it, but Spike is showing her she can be the thing without being the evil she fears. Because he really has that Being A Vampire thing DOWN, man! And in turn, she makes demands of what she can't live with -- someone who's killing. It's a give and take which really made me happy. This is the gold of this story, this moment of... well, Spuffy!
"She walks in beauty" is such a great poem for Buffy. (Though I have this silly, sappy headcanon that were he to recite that poem to her, he'd 'fix' it so it suited her perfectly and her tresses would be golden, not raven )
You know, I totally see him fiddling with the words, too.
I could just see him doing something delightfully sentimental like that
This was perfect:
“Just two words for you, mate,” Spike said, unable to keep the grin off his face. “I win.”
I can picture Spike's smug expression so clearly, and it made me grin too! I love that Buffy let loose on Angel and told him what she really thought, it's been a long time coming.
And the end of this chapter was so adorably sweet. I love this Spike. And Buffy will too.
This is a deeply, deeply lovable Spike, mostly because he fell in love with a souled ex-slayer. She's already corrupted him... poor bastard.
He won't ever admit it will he? Angel will never admit that seducing and popping the cherry of the Warrior for Good, the Slayer, gave him perfect happiness. He'll never admit that Angelus is there under his skin fighting the soul to get what he wants. He'll never admit that he gives into Angelus' desires because they are his desires. Because he is not two separate people. All one has to do is look at Dru and you will see what the end game was going to be for Buffy. Love? Liam/Angelus/Angel. It doesn't matter what name you call him, he doesn't know how to love. To lay that burden on Buffy. To make what happened partly her fault is evil and he won't admit it.
Yeah. I... have nothing to say to the above mini-essay except yep, absolutely, you are so on the nose. Well done! Bloody Angel!
So happy that Buffy finally got wise to Angel's manipulative selfishness.
With Buffy's happiness as his goal, Spike is running true to form.
Looking forward to seeing what happens next...
Oh, just a quick wrap up. Glad you're liking!
Well, they did try, it didn't work and it really shouldn't, not during these circumstances. They don't know that though, they don't know how it works or what happens when it does. Buffy is so scared, nervous and worried, no chance for any perfect happiness, even if she knew about it.
I loved the phone call she made to Angel, she got to say all those things we wanted her to. He's still her sire but he has lost the emotional power he had over her.
I loved how Spike told Slayer that he loved every part of her, the soul is only one part and if she lost that, she still has everything else left. Also great how he told her that she should let herself be happy and how his goal is to make her perfectly happy. That thought seems right for Spike, if Buffy lose her soul, then it means he treated her perfectly right.
They have talked about the soul but not so much about the fact that it's a curse. A curse is black magic and is not good for Buffy. It was probably not good for Willow to curse someone either.
If they want the soul to stay (hope not), they need to get rid of the curse.
Well, I did tell you you were going to love this story. THIS one.
Wasn't the Angel rant cathartic?
Yes you did say that, I will belive it when I see it
To be fair I do like your stories, the writing are extremely good. It was just one story that was totally destroyed to me. The sad part is, I liked it most of all, until "that" moment.
Well, when it comes to the soul, we're on very different sides on what it is, and what it means, and what the symbolism of it is. But in this instance I think we're both in agreement on this one. For this story. (You might not approve as much of the sequels, if I write them.)
My. Favorite. Chapter. Ever. Can't decide what I love more. The simply beautiful and perfect Spike speech that rivals the "your the one" abandoned house scene or the epic telephone Angel beatdown or The other great Spike speech about his goal to make her happy. It's like a perfect spuffy sandwich of Squshy Spike bread with the sweet jelly filling of Angel karma. Love it.
I love this review. I saved it for a while, not responding, because I wanted an excuse to read it over a bunch....
Anyway, thank you! Spuffy sandwich of Squishy Spike with Sweet Angel Karma Jelly... *grin!*
Heh. Yeah, she was way too worried for actual perfect happiness. Should have seen that coming.
Spike is just the sweetest! When he's not busy having a pissing contest with Angel, at least.
Isn't he just an adorable little slayer killer?
hah! I love it every time Angel gets his comeuppance. I never was his biggest fan, and the stalker-vibes he gives off always creeped me the fuck out. I loved it!
Angel is deeply, deeply creepy. Even when besouled. At least unsouled he's honest about his creep.
I LOVED the call and everything Buffy told him! And Spike’s “I win.” was great.
I loved the interactions between Buffy and Spike. There were sweet moments between them - he was adorable when was reciting poetry - and his poem! - to her. And his speech about his love for her was beautiful and touching.
“My goal in life until I succeed, right? Making you, my love, perfectly, deliriously happy. Yes. I plan to devote every bit of my energy to that, until you’re bloody sick of me.” “Or... perfectly happy?” Spike nodded. Awww. That’s Spike, always determined to do the impossible for the woman he loves.
Wonderful chapter! I really enjoyed it.
Gotta love a good Angel take down! And an adorable, loving, devoted Spike....
Ahhh satisfaction, I loved reading an Angel in all his deluded glory versus a don't shit Me, this is real live, asshole Buffy !!! Honesty , I could picture him at the other end of the line trying to make her understand how epic their love truly is, I think that how canon Angel saw himself and his life, an epic and tragic hero, he really didn't need more.
Spike trying to stay away from the eye of the hurricane, but finally unable to help himsef and going for the phone hahaha that was so him !!!
O. One more chapter. ..I don't know if I'm sad that is going to be over or happily anxious because I really really want to read Otherwise!
Aww... Well, Otherwise is coming next. I do have my eye on a couple sequels for this story. If you see anything called Slayer Fallen or Slayer Eternal, those will be the followups....
I loved it! You go girl! Angel better not show up or she might just send him back to hell now that she's opened her eyes to his bs. Thank you for the early update tonight
No trouble! And no way is she gonna put up with Angel in the mood she's in. She meant it. Go. To. Hell.
Spike on a mission. That's going to be fun. And wow did Buffy do a good job laying in on Angel. And Spike got his bit in, of course.
And you know, when he has a mission, he doesn't bloody give up! Not EVER. Until everything in his path is dead... mmmm.
Oh, they're just the cutest bad-ass vampire couple ever (and I'm glad she shares my concern about Spike's skull). Also, it's so enjoyable to hear her ream out Angel!
That was a BADLY needed Angel rant.